A Trans-Woman's Experience at Hedonism
Year 02 – Day 01
Monday – Evening Theme: Sizzling Jamaica
11AM Chair dance class (Gym)
11AM Speed dating (Dining room)
1PM Educational Sessions: Impact 101 (Disco)
2-4PM BDSM Day Play (Disco)
6-7PM Wine Tasting (Piano Bar)
7:30PM Beach Party/Fire Dancing
10PM Orgy Playroom (Kama Sutra)
10:30PM Dungeon Demonstration Showcase (Disco)
** ROUGH FIRST DRAFT - Enjoy **
This year felt different to me months ahead of even arriving. I had a lot of apprehension my first year going to Hedonism for so many reason: First international adventure, traveling solo, first time to a nude resort, I was still a virgin after my gender affirming vaginoplasty, I’m an introvert and didn’t know if I could keep up with the party, etc. etc. etc. This second year, I felt like a pro, knowing exactly what to expect. I had made connections via the app, but stuck to my rule of setting no hard plans.
As it turns out, I was going to be getting to Hedo late this year. Most people arrive and leave on Saturdays, but I wasn’t going to be on-property until Monday evening thanks to plans to run my first Marathon. The Portland Marathon was scheduled for Sunday morning of bi-week, so I had plans to catch a red-eye the evening after my race. Thanks to a heat-wave, my Marathon plans changed to a half-marathon; however, I filled my time reclaimed from running to earn my skydiving license.
-Wait, why does this matter? I broke a couple of bones in my hand/wrist on my final jump during a windy day, 3 weeks before my trip to Hedo. I had to wear a splint on my right hand & I’m a rightie, so I already knew I was going to have to get creative this year-
Anywho, I treated myself to Club Mobay for arrival at the airport so as to have an escort whisk me through customs & this made my trans heart so happy because my passport didn’t get approved at the new kiosks. I had quite a bit of Facial Feminization Surgery done in April of this year, so 6 months wasn’t enough time for the swelling to go down AND get my passport replaced with an updated picture. In similar fashion to my first year, I had no time to enjoy the lounge as the bus was already full and waiting on only me to head off on our journey to the resort. I did take a quick stop in the bathroom to pee before the 90-minute ride and I was already in a dress that I had changed into on the plane while everyone around me was sound asleep.
Thankfully there were only 2 other people waiting on me when I got on the bus. Sitting in the seat in front of them, I learned that they were heading to Hedonism as well, so we quickly became friends. They were two single guys who had decided to bunk together for two reasons: 1- Reduce costs, 2- There are limited spaces available for single occupancy rooms (I’ve heard 20). I was lucky enough to be one of those who booked early enough to not have to worry about being a single attendee.
There was a bit of mental gymnastics for me in regards to being a single female traveler, and being trans, and attending bi-week. It wasn’t just the expectations of being a “unicorn” for couples seeking a third, or the general societal expectations of female presenting people to exist in these places to be visual stimuli for the male-gaze (and female-gaze too but entirely differently). I almost felt an obligation to perform through my existence for all of those who are chasing Trans people just because they find trans people hot, to those who desire us because they see us as a stepping stone on their path to bi-sexuality that feels safer than a same-sex partner, and to those seeking the existence of others to gain comfortability expressing their own gender diversity. The hard part is that I want this attention too because it helps me feel validated in my feminine presentation, knowing that many view me as merely an object for their desires. Objectification and praise kink? I feel like I’m betraying feminism if I accidentally lean into anything too hard. Mental gymnastics.
I openly admit that sometimes we do seek out the chasers too because sometimes we just want sex. Just like everyone else.
For me specifically, I love to feel when someone is passionate about being with me. This is the core of all of my kinks – I want you to want me. I want you to kiss me as if the air from my lungs is your fuel. I want your hands to go where you want to touch me because nothing will make you happier in the moment than my breast in your hand while you roll my nipple ring between your fingers. I wear plastic piercings so that you don’t hurt your teeth if you want to bite them. Make me your favorite toy to play with. I want you to go down on me as if I was your favorite flavor. Bring me the heat of your passions and I’ll melt for you.
I had learned from my first year that I can be like a kid in a candy-store at Hedo, and that is how I was approaching year two. This year was going to be about experiencing as many new things as I could. I haven’t even been on top yet during intercourse, so things like that needed to be rectified.
Ultimately, I broke a different rule this year: Don’t catch feelings.
I arrived on-property mid-afternoon and disrobed as quickly as the check-in process permitted. I was on a mission to find my friends. I bounced bar to bar, being swarmed every time I stopped to talk with somebody else. I get it now why so many people call Hedo “home” with welcomes like this. So very many people sucking on my nipples while I chatted with others encircling us. Dozens of conversations with friends new and old flowed for the next few hours as I messaged people via the app to hunt them down.
I hadn’t made any dinner plans, but the buffet was being held on the beach tonight, with a stage for a live band, and the fire-spinners setting up for their show along the water. Finding a nearly empty table, I asked the two sitting there if I could join them, only to find yet another friend from last year to catch up with. They’re a drag performer who lets their gender expression be as bubbly as their energy, so I was so happy at the circumstance. Others floated in and out of the table as we discussed who we were and highlights of everyone’s trips so far. We all scattered and enjoyed the fire spinning performance, the heat radiating from their show being an excellent setting of the tone for the night of debauchery to be held by many in the audience.
While I was fairly tired due to the long travel day, I was in the mood to have a little bit of fun, so I decided to see what the scene at Kama Sutra was like. They turned it into the orgy room again this year. Exactly as I had come to know, there were a few people chatting in the lobby area & then sexual chaos behind the doors. I entered, stood to the side near the middle of a wall, and was approached no less than a minute later by a gorgeous woman. She grabbed my hand, stood on her toes to reach, and whispered into my ear that she had seen me on the app and was waiting to find me. She told me of how she had played with herself due to one of my teasing pictures in the app’s social feed. It was over for me from that moment – whatever she wanted, she could have. She asked me if I would like to play and I replied with a kiss. Her husband was nearby, but he was clearly there to watch at the moment and I later discovered he has a boy of his own that he was looking for. Her hands moved with deliberate movements as our lips danced. A bed was open on the other side of the room, so I took her hand and led us across the room, her husband following nearby. We laid down together & soon lost her beau as we got lost in each other. I couldn’t hold back any longer and moved my head between her legs, my lips learning her body along the way. She was delicious. Her body clearly communicated her desires and I did as I was told. Knowing I had an audience of my own, I made sure to keep my ass high in the air, legs wide. After she finished, the husband had come back from his own fun times & honestly, his disinterest in me turned me off a bit, so I happily stepped away as that couple connected with each other.
I never did catch her name, which is so odd for me. Is that too whorish? Meh…
I was really feeling tired at this point, so I thought I should go to my room and get some rest. Then I ran into yet another friend TM outside. TM and I never got a chance to connect more than conversation my first year, but he was on my wish-list. I was on my way back to my room when I changed my mind & decided to go back to the orgy room to see if I could find him again. Sadly I couldn’t find him, but another beautiful woman found me.
We exchanged names and pleasantries between RM, NW and myself before I once again found myself making out with naked people in an orgy room. In similar fashion to earlier, our kissing turned to petting, turning to finding another open bed with fresh sheets. The three of us claimed it before others could & before I could take off my glasses, a boob was in each of their mouths while I kneeled on the edge of the bed..
​
----RESERVED FOR BOOK----
​​
"Relentless" Appetite
​​
----RESERVED FOR BOOK----
​
​​
*********************************
The thoughts that come after
​
*********************************
​
-Reserved for Publication-